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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29608242">No Closets</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/UltimateFandomTrash/pseuds/Lif61'>Lif61 (UltimateFandomTrash)</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Lucifer (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alcohol, F/M, Humor, Kissing, POV Chloe Decker, Romance</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-16 03:14:02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,526</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29608242</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/UltimateFandomTrash/pseuds/Lif61</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Lucifer has made Chloe an offer. Does she take him up on it?</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Chloe Decker/Lucifer Morningstar</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>9</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>81</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>No Closets</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This idea came to me while I was falling asleep. I just had to write this.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Chloe sighed, slumping her head over the cup of coffee Lucifer had just brought over. The two of them were taking a break from following up a few dead-end leads, and were now squished into a small table at a café. True to form, Lucifer had popped the lid off his paper to-go cup, and was now pouring whiskey from his flask into it. So much for saving room for cream.</p>
<p>“I just… I don’t know what to do,” Chloe complained. “Everyone we talked to says they have no idea who this guy is.”</p>
<p>Lucifer finished “correcting” his coffee, and then pushed hers closer to her. His brown eyes were soft and gentle despite all the chaotic thoughts she knew were surely lurking behind them.</p>
<p>“Perhaps we don’t have to figure this out right now. Please rest, breathe. Have a drink. You look ravaged.”</p>
<p>The relaxing mood his deep brown eyes had seemed to have been setting up was utterly ruined with that, and she put her head in her hand.</p>
<p>“Really? Thanks, I feel so much better now.”</p>
<p>He pat her hand. “Good, that’s what I like to hear.”</p>
<p>She rolled her eyes. Of course, he didn’t understand sarcasm, mostly because he was too busy focusing on himself. She tried to relax, but she was too tense. Why wouldn’t she be? Yet again, she was stuck dealing with a difficult case, Trixie having problems at school thanks to the man sitting in front of her, and a load of celestial bullshit that she didn’t have the time for. And then there was Lucifer’s offer…</p>
<p>Lucifer took out his phone, and he seemed to be deep in thought as he scrolled through it. Chloe just looked around, taking in any possible threats despite these few minutes supposed to be part of her break. She hardly realized when their legs brushed together, and Chloe was okay with keeping it that way.</p>
<p>Maybe…</p>
<p>No. No, definitely not.</p>
<p>“What do you think a good present for a woman is?” Lucifer asked.</p>
<p>Right. Him and his sexual partners. He surely just wanted to make Chloe one more number on that impossibly long list; the list that was probably making the word <em>infinity</em> feel jealous right about now.</p>
<p>“Lucifer, I don’t want to help you with your… relationship drama.”</p>
<p>“Relationship drama?”</p>
<p>“Yeah, you know… all the people you sleep with.”</p>
<p>He laughed as if such an idea were ridiculous.</p>
<p>“Well, it’s not for any of them.”</p>
<p>Chloe leaned back and crossed her arms. “So, I suppose it’s for me, to try and get me to”—she gestured with her hand—”you know.”</p>
<p>“Don’t be ridiculous. I don’t need the help of gifts to get you in bed. And no, it’s for Maze. I can’t figure out why she’s mad at me.”</p>
<p>“I don’t know, maybe because you stole her knives and used them to frame her for murder?”</p>
<p>Lucifer sighed. “Look, that was a small misunderstanding, which is all cleared up now. I got bored.”</p>
<p>“Hmm, yeah? What else do you do when you’re bored?”</p>
<p>Lucifer put his phone away, and then started tearing at the cardboard paper cup holder with his fingers.</p>
<p>“You know, there’d be a lot more for me to do if, uh…”</p>
<p>“No.”</p>
<p>Lucifer actually stamped his foot, and practically whined, “Why not?”</p>
<p>“Ew. Don’t be a baby.”</p>
<p>He gasped. “How dare you! I bear absolutely zero resemblance to those helpless, little breast-hoggers.”</p>
<p>At this point, Chloe wasn’t even sure she was annoyed. She just thought having this back and forth with him was funny.</p>
<p>With a smile starting to break out on her face as she raised her coffee to her lips, “Could’ve fooled me.”</p>
<p>Lucifer’s mouth was open, clearly aghast. Chloe just watched him, amused, as the mix of sweet and bitter drink warmed her mouth. By the time she put her cup down he seemed to understand. He was laughing now. Seemingly on some instinct, or some long practiced behavior, he reached out and grabbed Chloe’s hand.</p>
<p>The world stopped, a fiery tingle going through her from his touch.</p>
<p><em>Why,</em> why<em>?</em></p>
<p>Lucifer’s mojo didn’t work on her, so why was it that she was even feeling this? It had to be something he was doing, right? Somehow he’d found some way to trick her?</p>
<p>Chloe couldn’t take her hand out of his, just enjoying the warmth and comfort of his touch. His skin was soft, as if he wasn’t a fighter, as if he hadn’t worked with his hands for a single day in his life. His piano player fingers cupped her hand gently and caressed her knuckles. Despite that gentle exterior, she knew great strength lay beneath it.</p>
<p>The stress of the day, of the week, seemed to fade away, and she brushed her thumb along his. Looking into his eyes, she didn’t see narcissism, or impulsivity. There was just… vulnerability.</p>
<p>Chloe inhaled sharply, the air in her lungs welcoming, as if she hadn’t breathed in years.</p>
<p>She licked her lips as she stared at him, her eyes taking in as much as they could. Oh god, how was he real? Well, she supposed God did have something to do with it.</p>
<p>“Are you all right, Detective?”</p>
<p>Chloe tried to find words, and he took her hand in both of his now.</p>
<p>“I—I…”</p>
<p>“Oh dear, perhaps I should take you home,” he said, as if he had no idea that she was perfectly fine (if you considered being turned on by the Devil as <em>fine</em>). He started pulling her up to her feet. “Okay, come on.”</p>
<p>She pulled back slightly, the change in blood pressure from standing giving her some clarity.</p>
<p>“No, no. I’m fine. It’s— Yeah, everything’s good.”</p>
<p>Lucifer just gave her a skeptical look.</p>
<p>“Then please tell me what’s going on.”</p>
<p>Chloe grabbed his coffee.</p>
<p>“Wait, Detective, that’s—”</p>
<p>She had a sip, and winced at the burn of the whiskey he’d put into it. Mixed with the coffee, it left her lips feeling warm and sensuous.</p>
<p>“That had whiskey in it, you know,” he said as she handed it back to him.</p>
<p>
  <em>Sure did.</em>
</p>
<p>“Yeah, I know. So, how about instead of taking me home, we go back to your place?”</p>
<p>“My place?”</p>
<p>Chloe sidled up close to him, and she ran her hands up over his chest. When she found the top button of his shirt, she popped it free, and then let her fingers trail over the barest bit of skin she’d revealed. Lucifer inhaled deeply.</p>
<p>Trying so hard to shut her confusing thoughts off, wishing she had more whiskey in her, Chloe said, “I want to take you up on your offer.”</p>
<p>Lucifer stopped breathing. For a moment Chloe was worried she’d somehow turned him into a statue.</p>
<p>Then, he suddenly put his coffee down, grabbed her (one arm around her, his other hand in hers) and started taking her to the counter with all the baked goods.</p>
<p><em>What the hell is he</em> doing<em>?</em></p>
<p>“Excuse me,” Lucifer called to the pudgy Asian man working the register. “Do you have a closet somewhere? Or a back room, perhaps?”</p>
<p>Chloe’s eyes widened, realizing what he was doing. She tried pulling out of his grip, cheeks already beginning to flush red, but he pulled her tight against him, oblivious to the fact that this was completely inappropriate.</p>
<p>“A… closet?” the cashier asked, clearly confused.</p>
<p>“Yes, this woman’s just taken me up on an offer, and it’s imperative that I pleasure her immediately.”</p>
<p>Chloe wanted to sink through the floor.</p>
<p>She took action, using his touch to pull him away. Blushing, laughing from pure discomfort, she said, “No, no! Lucifer, that’s—that’s fine. We—we shouldn’t—” She swallowed and turned back to the cashier. “Sorry about that.” Then she whispered, “He’s feeling a little sick.”</p>
<p>Lucifer gasped. “I assure you I’m perfectly—”</p>
<p>The cashier just had wide eyes as he watched them, mouth slightly open. Chloe now faced the door, finding it very important that she got him out of there immediately, before he could say anything else stupid.</p>
<p>“Lucifer, we’re leaving.”</p>
<p>“What? Why?”</p>
<p>She managed to get him out the door, and she was disappointed to find that the fresh air did little to cool her heated cheeks.</p>
<p>“Are you serious?”</p>
<p>
  <em>Wow, he’s actually an idiot, isn’t he?</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Why, Chloe? Why?</em>
</p>
<p>“Yes, I want to find the most convenient spot as soon as possible, so—”</p>
<p>Chloe kissed him, shutting him up. He relaxed against her. He pulled her close, one hand at the back of her head. Heat thrummed through her from the touch of his lips, from pressing up against him. In fact, she felt a little dizzy with how quickly her body had decided to start throbbing in between her legs.</p>
<p>Somehow, she got herself to pull away, though his smell still surrounded her; she was drunk off of it.</p>
<p>“Like I said, let’s go back to your place.”</p>
<p>Lucifer’s cheeks reddened, the rest of him going pale.</p>
<p>Then, he smiled, breaths starting to come quickly. Chloe was sure she had forgotten how to breathe normally as well.</p>
<p>“Well, come on then, Chloe! And I promise, no closets.”</p>
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